OH CANADA!!!

The following takes place while driving back to Michigan from NY. At this particular moment in time, I'm approaching the Canadian border, ready to meet....the dreaded customs official.

BTW, the Nexus passes that we have aren't allowed through the particular customs check point I decided to use. Wrong on my part, completely. Usually getting into Canada is a breeze. They don't even look at you, hardly ask any questions...and you're through! So, here's the story:

I'm pulling up to Customs checkpoint with Isaac in tow in the back, singing his little heart out. I hand the *lady* all of her official documents: passport, Isaac's birth certificate, and our Nexus passes (which are almost as legit as passports.)

*Rude lady* begins to shuffle through the papers, and studies them for waaaay too long. She has that mean custom border official look on her face. Crap, I shouldn't have chose her line.

She then looks up at me, and studies my face. I give my best smile. No response on her part. She just scowls all the more at me. And then she turns her attention to Isaac in the back. This is after she has asked me my citizenship, and what I was doing in NY.

Rude lady: "Who's the kid's father?" (yes, she did call him "kid" which I think is so white trash)
Jeannette: "That would be my husband, Sean."
Rude Lady: "Well, where is your husband?"
J: "He's at home in Michigan. I went to NY to help my mom watch my sister's kids while they were away. His schedule doesn't allow for him to make too many trips with me."

Snaps her gum.

Rude Lady: Do you have a note from the father?
J: "What do you mean?"
RL: "It's vital that any time you travel without your husband, that he writes a letter of consent, and that he signs it with his phone number so that we can contact him to make sure that you are the mother, and that he is aware of what you are doing."
J: baffled, "Oh, I've never been explained that before, or else I would have made sure to bring a (stupid) letter of consent. I've crossed through Canada probably 20 times in the past three years and this is the first time anyone has mentioned this." Mind you, I didn't say stupid to her face. You don't mess with Custom folk.
RL: "Well, that's not my problem. For all I know, you could have kidnapped this boy."
I let out a baffled kind of gasp.
J: "Are you serious? (oops, probably crossed the line there by asking RL if she was serious, but, HELLO!!) I just provided you with more than what's necessary on your checklist to get through your country, and I'm being accused of abducting my son? What else can I possibly do to prove to you that he's my son? My name is right on his birth certificate. Look."
RL: "Well, for all I know, you could have stolen these documents."
Now, I'm just furious, and I'm trying to find a way to not say too much that will land me in custom jail, or whatever they have.
J: "Well, I didn't. He's my son, and I will be sure to follow orders next time and make sure my husband writes you a note." Meanwhile, I'm thinking....HOW THE HECK WOULD A NOTE PROVE THAT HE IS MY SON??? I could go find a 12 year old kid, and tell him to write something on a loose leaf piece of paper, and that would count?? Seriously??

Now because I'm very familiar (or so I thought!) with the customs system, I knew that if she picked up a pen, and started writing on her clip board that it was a bad thing. It usually means you have to pull over into the customs/immigration building and talk with an official, and hope that they allow you through. I've known people who've had to wait 3-4 hours!! So, the fact that I saw her writing, I was maaaaaad.

Jeannette: "Are you making me pull over to be investigated?"
RL: "Mam, I'm shocked and disturbed by the fact that you are getting mad that we're doing our job on cutting down on abducted children. Yes, you will have to go talk to an officer."
She rips off her piece of paper, and hands it to me, and I drive away.

Inside, I get in line to talk to an officer. He calls me over and questions me. Within 10 minutes, I'm back on the road. What did he do that was any different than Rude Lady? Absolutely nothing. Oooooooooooooooo.....